💡 Chris & Terry’s Chandelier Services – “Don’t Worry, We’ve Done Hundreds!”

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If it’s hanging, delicate, and sparkling – we’ll definitely drop it in style!

Ever fancied having a chandelier fitted with the grace and poise of a ballet dancer? Then please look elsewhere. But if you’re after a story, a laugh, and maybe a new ceiling, welcome to Chris & Terry’s Chandelier Services – the dynamic duo redefining the phrase “it’ll be alright on the night.”

🛠️ The Scene: A Grand House, Two Lads, One Job

It started like any other Wednesday. Chris, armed with a spanner and a questionable amount of confidence, and Terry, holding a roll of masking tape and a cup of tea, stood beneath a crystal chandelier the size of a small car.

The client, Lady Featherstone-Blythe (probably), said:

“It’s a priceless heirloom – very dear to the family. Can you take it down gently?”

Chris winked.

“Don’t worry, love. We’ve done hundreds.”

Spoiler: they hadn’t.

⚙️ Terry Finds the Bolts, Chris Finds the Wrong Chandelier

Chris, being the brains of the operation, sent Terry up into the attic to loosen the bolts. Meanwhile, Chris waited downstairs with a dust sheet, humming the Mission Impossible theme.

Terry gave the signal:
“Ready when you are!”

Chris loosened the screws on the chandelier.

One slight problem…
Terry was working on the other chandelier.

Cue slow-motion disaster.

CRASH.
GLASS.
SILENCE.

😂 What We Offer (Sort of)

Despite that small mishap (and a lifetime ban from several stately homes), Chris & Terry now offer slightly more experienced services:

  • 🪜 Chandelier removal & fitting (with better communication now)
  • 💡 Light fixture installation (on purpose!)
  • 🔧 Ceiling inspections (to make sure it stays up)
  • 🧹 Full clean-up service (especially broken crystal)

And of course, we now bring extra dust sheets.

📞 Book Today – We Promise Not to Drop It (Again)

If you fancy a chandelier fitted without needing a new floor, give Chris & Terry’s Chandelier Services a call. We’re like Only Fools and Horses — only slightly more insured.

Call now: 0791 7852384
Or book us online… at your own risk.

🏆 What Our Clients Say

“They were hilarious, charming, and somehow my chandelier survived. 10/10 for entertainment value!” – Mrs. Benson, Bromley

“They broke mine but bought me a new one. Honest lads, really.” – Lord Wobbleton, Kent